Virgil’s Zero Sugar Lemon Lime

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Virgil’s Zero Sugar Lemon Lime

I don’t usually focus on sugar free sodas, but I’ll review any soda handed to me… eventually. This can of Virgil’s Zero Sugar Lemon Lime was handed to me a few months ago, but its time to shine (hopefully) is now. For those of you unfamiliar with the Virgil’s Zero Sugar line let me break it down. Virgil’s has a line of Zero Sugar sodas…. OH! They’re also All-Natural. That’s pretty much it. Last time I had the Root Beer and was very impressed with what I tasted. Today is Lemon Lime. Lemon Lime is a flavor that lends itself a bit better than root beer to being sugar free, so I’m hopeful for what’s ahead.

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Rocket Fizz All Natural Chocolate Soda

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Rocket Fizz All Natural Chocolate Soda

The soda I’m about to consume is made with real cocoa.  Rocket Fizz All Natural Chocolate Soda is what’s at hand and I kinda want to skip all the fluff and take a swig.  I’ll of course do that, but the parchment like label complete with “wax seal” make me giggle.  That’s how you know it’s fancy, because there’s a picture of a wax seal.  Good stuff.

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O-Zell Cherry Jubilee

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O-Zell Cherry Jubilee

I am not feeling this review today… which means I probably shouldn’t do it.  The creative juices aren’t flowing, I don’t really want a soda right now, and even these sentences are just to fill up space.  Yet, there’s some part of me that is hoping that once I open this bottle of O-Zell Cherry Jubilee my mood will improve and I’ll be singing its praises as my creativity is renewed.

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Sipp Summer Pear

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Sipp Summer Pear

I like pears; I like green tea; I like honey.  If all those statements are true, which they are, then I should like Sipp Summer Pear.  Those three ingredients are all accounted for in this bottle to my right.  The other ingredients listed are carbonated water, organic agave nectar, citric acid, and natural flavor.  While I’ve never been good about this vague “Natural Flavor” ingredient, when surrounded by stars like that I care a lot less.

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Tommyknocker Almond Creme

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Tommyknocker Almond Creme

You know I’m a sucker for fun label art, right?  Well Tommyknocker Almond Creme has tickled my fancy with their dwarfish looking miner holding a foaming mug.  He looks so happy, almost Santa like in his serenity.  While his face doesn’t show the markings of working underground you can tell he’s pleased with his drink choice.

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Onli Hibiscus Pomegranate Strawberry

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Sigh… I’m worried about this review.  The last two sodas from Onli that I tasted did not agree at all with my buds.  To make matters worse today’s flavor includes hibiscus, something I’ve never really enjoyed.  The name it’s parents call it when it’s in trouble is Onli Hibiscus Pomegranate Strawberry.  It’s unsweetened and a beautiful rose color.  I know it’s unsweetened because it says so in bold print at least three times on the bottle.  So… here we go with the lowest expectations possible.

He's trying to see what the iguana is looking at.

The aroma is a nice, light strawberry scent that tries to seduce my mind.  It’s not going to work though.  Even though this smells of something I should sip on a hot summer day I know better… or at least I think I do.  

Onli makes the world's most confusing beverages.  I’m 100% ok with this.  It’s not delicious and amazing, but I understand what their doing and approve.  The two sodas I had prior to this one didn’t compute in my mind or mouth.  In my opinion, and that of the people around me while reviewing, they were awful.  

Onli Hibiscus Pomegranate Strawberry starts off with a bitter burst, but it transitions easily into a pomegranate/strawberry mineral water.  It’s definitely a sipping beverage and not a chugging one.  The fragile flavors fight with the bitters of the hibiscus and carbonation, but ultimately the sides call truce and live in harmony.

A powerful array of bubbles is ever present and adds some texture to the mouthfeel of the soda.  There is not a strong aftertaste and your mouth gets no syrupy buildup sip after sip.  I feel alright drinking this, no guilt at all.  Then again there are maybe 3 beverages I’d have any guilt about consuming.  

So that’s it then.  Onli makes sodas that flit and flicker all across my taste spectrum.  Thankfully my most recent memory of them will be positive.  Want an unsweetened soda that you might actually enjoy, give this one a try.

~A

This soda was purchased at an HEB Grocer

Onli Grapefruit Pomelo and Peach

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So earlier in the week I tried my second Onli beverage and it was pretty dang terrible.  Today I have another Onli beverage and I don’t know what one of the ingredients is.  The flavor of the day is Onli Grapefruit (yes) Pomelo (what?) and Peach (yes).  What’s a pomelo?  Let’s consult the internet.  Citrus Maxima is the scientific name and I like that a lot.  Pomelo is also a word used for grapefruit in some cases, but that would make the label redundant so I’m assuming that’s not what’s happening here.

Clearly he hasn't tasted it.

I’d look at the ingredients but someone removed the ingredient label so I’m going to assume that since it only has 15 calories that there is some non-sugar, but all natural, sweetener at work here.   Probably Erythritol, assuming I spelled that correctly.

In the “Good News” category this smells like a grapefruit soda and I like those.  So we’re two for two in good things now.  Good thing number 1 was “Citrus Maxima” for those who don’t like to re-read things.

This just in from the guy sitting one table over, we’ll call him Buttons.  Buttons says that pomelo is an original citrus fruit that many current fruits came from.  Pomelo + Mandarin = Grapefruit / Common Oranges.

Wow that’s an insanely bitter soda.  I keep trying it to parse out all the flavors, and each time a guttural noise comes out of my face.  The grapefruit is apparent in taste and I can only assume the Pomelo is too.  Peach on the other hand is represented as more of a theory.  It’s the essence of peach really.  You see it on the label so your brain tells you the aroma should be there… so it is.

Once again I don’t want to drink anymore of this soda.  It’s a deceptively pretty soda that lures you in with an artistic picture of citrus fruit… then reality sets in.

~A

This was purchased at an HEB Grocery Store

 

Onli Green Tea Lemongrass Mango

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Green tea needs to be in waaaaaay more sodas.  Thankfully today I have one in front of me called Onli Green Tea Lemongrass Mango.  Onli makes lightly flavored sodas that taste the way sparkling water should… of course I’m basing that on one soda.  They are “Sparkling & All Natural”, sugar free (sweetened with Erythritol), and in this case has some Monk Fruit Extract in it.  So that begs the question, how does a 5 calorie soda taste when sugar is removed from the equation?

At least they used Green Tea

That smells like a bag of nickles, I’m no longer excited to drink this.  With a strong whiff I do get some of the mango and green tea aroma, but it’s not powerful enough to sway my worries.

Nope.  Nope.  One more sip.  Nope.  That tastes like a bag of nickels with a little bit of green tea and mango flavor as well.  

Each sip ends with a painful wince because of how bitter the soda is.  The initial taste is lightly sweetened, fruity, and enjoyable.  Sadly, it almost immediately transitions into a metallic taste which then performs a ritual and summons the devil upon your tongue.  The devil then dances a merry jig upon your taste buds (this creates a bitter taste for those down on their lore) and vanishes from your mouth.  

I don’t want to drink this anymore so I’m going to stop and leave nearly three quarters of this soda unconsumed.  I will say that the light mango taste is enjoyable for less than a second… you know, just so I don’t leave this on a bad note.

~A

I purchased this soda at an HEB Grocery Store

Onli Lemon Watermelon

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I picked up this drink because it’s pink.  It’s a very tasty shade of pink that normally promises that it’ll be unique and delicious.  That said, I almost put it down when I read it was “Chef Inspired”.  What does that even mean?  Thankfully under “Chef Inspired” I read it was sparkling, all natural, and had some ginseng in it.  All natural fruit flavored beverages are usually pretty tasty, so I figured I might as well give it a go.

Ingredient wise Onli (GET IT?  ONLY?!) is full of carbonated triple filtered mountain water, natural cane sugar, natural flavors (boooo just tell me what they are), lemon juice concentrate, malic acid, panax ginseng extract, and finally fruit and vegetable juice for color.

See that sounds pretty good, right?  Fortunately it smells like lemon watermelon so at least it’s not a complete lie.  Color me hopeful for the flavor… perhaps I’d be pink.

Very nice!  Lemon tastes the lead in this dance, but watermelon is light on her feet as well.  The carbonation is robust and very much apart of the production.  Each sip is full of bubbles which results in a great mouthfeel.    

Flavor wise this tastes like the way I wish sparkling water did.  It’s not syrupy at all, I’d even go so far as to say it’s a bit dry.  Onli Lemon Watermelon would be a great beverage to pair with a host of things.  I’m not going to pretend to know which ones so excuse me if I don’t suggest anything.

This is also the kind of beverage that could make you seem like someone who enjoys “the finer” things in life.  Perhaps you put a pack in your fridge so you can bust one out during the big game and impress everyone in the room.  They won’t know what to think.  Just know that their stunned silence and eventual mocking of you means they like you.

Seriously though, this is a great soda for those who aren’t big on sugar, even though it has 22 grams.  It’s not overly sweet, its flavor is delightful and it’s all natural.  Pretty good list of positives if you ask me, and you did since you’re reading the review.

The only reason I’m not rating this higher is due to personal preference.  I prefer drinks with a stronger flavor and a little more sugar, but don’t let my love of sweet sway you from trying this out.

~A

This soda was purchased from an HEB grocery store.