Soda Reviews

Lipton Sparkling Iced Tea Citrus Green Tea

So for the 800th review I decided to go with tea.  While the green and silver can of Lipton Sparkling Iced Tea really called to me it was the Citrus Green Tea flavor that sealed the deal.  For those not in the know, Lipton is a brand synonymous with instant tea here in the ol’ U.S. of A.  It’s not of super high quality, but you can get a dang good iced tea out of it when you need one.

Twist has a bit of a green bias in this case.

Lipton Sparkling Iced Tea uses sugar to sweeten and lists green tea as the fourth ingredient.  Both of these things make me feel a little bit better as to what I’m about to consume.  Smell wise it’s a little like dish soap and cucumbers, so it’s not as if I’m without doubt.  That just spurs me on as we all  know The Soda Jerks motto:  When in doubt, try it out!.  Ok, so we’ve never had a motto but I just thought of that and wanted to type it..

Well, at the very least it’s refreshing. This is helped by the microbubbles (I don’t remember if this is a real word or if I just created it) that rush across my tongue creating a very light mouthfeel.  Taste wise the citrus, which seems to mostly focus on lemon or lime, dominates at first.  This initial citrus burst slowly fades and leaves behind the green tea that was promised in the labeling.

The aftertaste reminds me a little of champagne.  Perhaps it’s the little bit of bitter paired with a somewhat muted sweetness that creates it.  It’s actually quite nice and I don’t really like champagne.  

Lipton Sparkling Iced Tea Citrus Green Tea is a beverage I would consider picking up again on a hot day.  It’s less sugar than your standard soda (18 grams) and still delivers in the flavor department.  It may not have been the celebratory beverage I craved for review 800, but anything good enough for a second sip is good enough for me.

Verdict - Buy a Pack


Random Person 5 Word Review - Sweet, but can’t taste tea.

This was purchased at a Walgreens Pharmacy

Dirty Girl Skip Orange Cream

A tattooed young woman (we’ll assume her name is Lydia) stands in front of an American muscle car.  That’s the label for my orange cream soda that sits before me.  Honestly, it’s what got me to pick it up… well that and the name.  Dirty Girl Skip Orange Cream.  There’s so much in that name that intrigues me.

On her back is the Battle of Waterloo

I’ll assume a “Dirty Girl” is a slang term for tattooed woman like Lydia here.  I’m not sure what “Skip” is, but it pairs nicely with the term “Dirty Girl” so who cares.  Orange Cream is clearly the flavor of cane sugar sweetened beverage I’m about to consume, so let’s just jump in now.

Upon opening I’m greeted with more orange than cream, but enough cream to soothe any worries I might have had.  It’s going to be a somewhat tart orange judging by the aroma.  This might create a fun dichotomy of… I’m just kidding… I’m not feeling pretentious today.

That’s a good little orange cream.  My initial taste is the tart orange burst I anticipated.  It’s of the candied variety, but still quite tasty.  Many sugar sweetened orange sodas have an overpowering cardboard taste to me for some odd reason, thankfully this one is on the weaker end.

The next sensation in line is a somewhat violent mash up of orange and vanilla.  It’s as if Orange spent too much time on the stage and Vanilla finally had enough.  Stomping feet propelling her across the stage, Vanilla pushes orange only to be shoved back.  The shoving match is brief as Orange relents quickly knowing he’s in the wrong.

What I’m left with is basically an aftertaste of cream alone. The orange flavor may live on in burps, but it’s the sweet vanilla that resides on my lips for the next several moments.  It’s a pleasant finish to a solid soda.

Verdict - Buy a Pack


This was purchased at Rocket Fizz Houston


Crystal Pepsi

Well, it’s happened. My soda powers have culminated and the three sodas I wished back onto this plane of reality are here.  First Surge, then Sprite Re-Mix, and now Crystal Pepsi.  If there are any other extinct sodas out there you’d like me to channel back into existence just shoot me an e-mail.

Right now, Twist is living in the past!

So Crystal Pepsi has a couple of things going for it even before I open the bottle.  It’s the first soda I specifically remember consuming.  I’m sure I had sodas prior to it, but I still remember picking this up at the local Stop ‘N Go and being amazed that a cola could be clear.  I was holding it though, I was holding a clear cola.  

Crystal Pepsi was a success.  Coke grew nervous and created Tab Clear to confuse the market.  To make people think that clear colas were diet or sugar free or not that good… and it worked.  Tab Clear was a murder-suicide of the soda kind.  They never expected it to work, just tossed it out there to rid themselves of the threat.

Crystal Pepsi went away for a while, but due to my generation's love of pop culture nostalgia it’s back.  That all said, it’s time to write a review.

The packaging is delightfully retro, but I notice the “best buy date” is October 31, of 2016.  Why does Crystal Pepsi have a “best buy date” that’s two months away? My guess is that the soda will cloud and not be as clear in a couple of months, though I truly have no idea why.

Smell wise it’s clear (HA!) to me that I just opened a cola.  It’s lighter in scent than many colas on the market, but still easily distinguished.  Here’s hoping the taste matches my expectations.

That’s not as “cola” flavored as I thought it would be, then again I’m basing all of this on a memory that’s 25 years old.  Citrus is present.  I know a clear soda is usually associated with citrus, but 10 year old me thought this was a cola and nothing else.  

It’s like Lemon and Lime couldn’t get into the sexy dance party because they weren’t old enough.  So in typical mischievous fashion they decide that Lemon should stand on Lime’s shoulders and they’ll wear a big heavy coat of cola.  The doorman (my tongue in this example) sees through their disguise, but lets them pass anyway.  He likes the two scallywags and appreciates the trouble they went through to get in the sexy dance club.  That’s my feelings on Crystal Pepsi in a nutshell.

This isn’t quite cola, but I see what they attempted and like that they took the time and resources to do it.  I don’t love it, but I’m glad to see it again like many of the nuggets of my childhood we keep digging up time and time again.

Verdict - Buy a Bottle


This was purchased at Wal-Mart, perhaps you’ve heard of them.

Ramune Lychee

I don’t know what lychee tastes like.  The more worldly fellow in front of me compares it to passionfruit… kind of.  Fortunately for me I have a bottle of Ramune Lychee with me today so I can at least expand that horizon.  I’ve already been told that this has a good carbonation by the aforementioned fellow, so it at least has that going for it.


It’s hard to get an aroma from one of these cod necked bottles (the ones that require you to push a marble out of the way to drink).  What I can get is a miscellaneous fruit aroma, which probably smells of lychee… I just don’t realize it.

Interesting.  It’s lightly flavored like a carbonated water, but somewhat heavily sweetened like a soda.  You know what this is like?  Ramune Lychee tastes like a sweet grape with a slightly bitter aftertaste.  There’s also a little hint of soap as well, but something tells me that’s just my uninitiated tastebuds struggling to find a comparison flavor.

Personally I find the carbonation to be a little weak, though the guy in the first paragraph did have a sip almost as soon as I opened the bottle so maybe I just didn’t get to it soon enough.  The lack of bubbles, light flavor, and somewhat heavy sweetener make this a one time beverage for me.

Verdict - Buy a Bottle


I purchased this at Spec’s Liquor

Hi-C Ecto Cooler

Long time readers of the site know that on occasion I’ll review a non-carbonated beverage.  Most times I do so because I falsely believed the beverage was carbonated which leads to an embarrassing time for all.  Other times it’s because I feel the beverage is culturally important enough at the time to include.


I guess what I’m trying to say here is that Hi-C Ecto Cooler is of cultural importance to my generation and I’m going to review it here and now.  Oddly enough I was never big into Ecto Cooler when it first came out, I just thought it was cool that Slimer was on the box art.  Thinking about it even more I wasn’t really into Hi-C growing up either, that came at a much later age for me.

Either way, today I’m going to review Hi-C Ecto Cooler and join the ranks of the millions of review sites doing the exact same thing.

The bright green “slime” label would have you believe Ecto Cooler is some insane flavor combination, but the non-slimed portion of the can tells you it’s a “Citrus Drink”.  To be a bit more specific it’s a tangerine flavored beverage.  Heck, the ingredients include both tangerine and orange juice from concentrate.  Yet when you pour out the beverage you can see that it has a nice green coloration to it… ya know… cause of the slime.

This smells like oranges and tangerines of the candied variety.  Quite similar to another Hi-C flavor, Orange Lavaburst.  Now, Lavaburst is my go to when I’m frequenting a McDonalds so I’m quite familiar with the flavor and will recognize it if I taste it here in a second.  Stand by.

Even though I didn’t drink this as a child it reminds me of the 80’s.  It’s a bit smoother than Lavaburst and has a more tangeriney taste on the back end.  Much like your [INSERT LOVED ONE HERE] it goes down easily and the burn isn’t nearly as intense as the one you just suffered.  

Ecto Cooler isn’t an overly sweet beverage either, but there’s enough sugar in it to remind you that what you’re consuming probably isn’t all that healthy for you.  All the Vitamin C in the world isn’t going to help when 12oz has 41 grams of sugar in it.  

Joe says “Hi”.  A man named Joe just walked by as I wrote this review and said “Say ‘Hi’ for me.” so I did.

Anywho, Hi-C Ecto Cooler is a tasty beverage that I’d happily drink more of.  That’s honestly what it boils down to.  Coca-Cola did what is so very popular nowadays and bottled nostalgia.  Thankfully this nostalgia didn’t spoil, must have been preserved in all the slime.

Verdict - Buy a Pack


This was given to me by one Mike