Original New York Seltzer Root Beer Soda

/

Confused, I stare at a tiny bottle of clear “root beer soda”.  It’s made by Original New York Seltzer so I’m going to assume that it’s seltzer water flavored with root beer.  Even if that’s true I’m still looking at this bottle with a tilted head... because I’m confused and because the ingredients are written sideways.  Carbonated water, cane sugar, citric acid, and natural flavors are what make up this 10oz bottle of mystery.  

Original New York Orange Hippo

Flavored seltzer water is usually on the bitter side, but this one has 33 grams of sugar in it so I’m hoping it’ll be quite sweet.  The bottle cap states that “The choice is clear” and that’s enough for me to already love this beverage.

Ok, so Original New York Seltzer Root Beer Soda smells like a root beer, but it’s a thin aroma so I’m not sure how rich the taste is going to be.  I suppose I shouldn’t assume a rich taste because this isn’t a root beer… it’s root beer flavored seltzer.  New things are so much fun to try.

That’s so very odd.  The powerful fizz of seltzer paired with the taste of root beer barrel candy.  Each sip starts off crisp and refreshing before introducing the root beer flavoring and then eventually fading away somewhat.  As far as aftertaste goes it’s fairly honest to the original flavor, but holds on longer than I appreciate.

I’m not sure how to say this, but it’s definitely not root beer… yet it’s root beer flavored.  On the sugar front it’s quite the sweet soda.  Only a the smallest amount of bitter taste is created by the seltzer, but the crisp mouthfeel is still present.  

Such an odd combination yet it works.  It’s not going to replace root beer or anything crazy, but at least now I can look fancy whilest enjoying a tiny clear soda.  This coupled with a short ingredient list will assure I pick up another bottle or two next time I see them.

~A

This was purchased at World Market

Earp's Original Sarsaparilla

/

The bottle in front of me is sort of amazing.  First off it features an “actor” dressed us as Wyatt Earp.  How do you get that gig?  “Hey, we need someone for the role of Earp.”  “I’m an aspiring actor, I’ll fill your roll.  Where will this be broadcast?”  “Oh, no you aren’t performing… we’re just gonna take your picture and put it on a bottle.”

Hippo butt.

Speaking of the bottle again, this is called Earp’s ORIGINAL Sarsaparilla.  The capitalization is for emphasis, but “original” makes one believe there are other variations of Earp’s Sarsaparilla out there.  I’m not 100% sure they’re aren’t, but I’d put down $10 that says I’m right.

For real now, let’s get this review underway.  Earp’s Original Sarsaparilla is made with cane sugar and some artificial/natural flavors.  Nothing too crazy going on here.

The aroma has more of a licorice kick than I thought it would.  Root beer of course is another scent I’m experiencing, but that’s to be expected as sarsaparilla is its cousin.

That’s average.  On the bite/cream scale this seems to lean more towards bite, as there’s a good amount of burn and fizz, but the flavor itself is unmistakably average. 

Surprisingly the licorice taste isn’t very noticeable either which kind of disappoints me.  Well now that I said that my last sip had plenty of black licorice goodness.  So Wyatt Earp has made me a liar and I’m ok with that… because it’s still average.

So you have a bitey root beer with the taste of licorice.  This flavor is hanging out in my mouth for longer than I appreciate it to.  “Hanging out” is a fairly nice term as it just won’t leave due to it’s somewhat syrupy feel.  

Earp’s Original Sarsaparilla is alright, but nothing special.  If offered one take it.  If you want to try one do so, but don’t expect to be blown out of the water.

~A

This soda was purchased at a Shell Gas Station

O-So Butterscotch Root Beer

/

I will be amazed if I ever have a butterscotch root beer that I don’t like.  It’s butterscotch and root beer… how can that combo lose?  Well I suppose you could dislike either one of those flavors and it would lose quite handily.  For those poor at foreshadowing I’m reviewing a butterscotch root beer, O-So Butterscotch Root Beer to be exact.

O-So that's what he's looking at.

O-So starts off on a good foot because I think the labeling is fantastic.  It’s a very 1960’s looking label, if not a little older as the bottle even states that O-So has been around since the 40’s.  The artwork  really does a good job at making me feeling nostalgic for a time where I wasn’t even born.  There’s even a fun phrase at the bottom. “O-So Delicious!” GET IT?  THE SODA NAME IS USED IN THE SENTENCE!  So now that visually we’re starting off right, I hope the aroma is also a plus.

Hooray!  The aroma is a butterscotch root beer combo, just as it should be.  The butterscotch is the dominant scent, but not so much that you forget it’s a root beer.  Now that I know the smell is on point I feel comfortable saying the taste will be above average at the very least.

There’s that roasted marshmallow flavor I look forward too.  The flavor is both creamy and buttery at the start, but finishes up with a nice strong bite at the back of the throat.  This dichotomy really ups the enjoyment factor of the soda.  You can tell i’m serious about this because I used the word “dichotomy”.  I even chuckled to myself when I did because of how simultaneously ridiculous and smart I felt.

I guess the creamy/bite relationship is a lot like that of the salty/sweet.  Sure each one is good by their lonesome, but it’s easy to get burnt out on them.  Pair the two together and your “want” becomes a “crave”.  I’m not sure that I’ll be craving O-So Butterscotch Root Beer when I’m done with this, but I’ll certainly want additional bottles in my possession.

While sweet it’s not overly so, but I’m not sure I’d want to drink this with a meal.  I think I’m officially going to designate this as a dessert soda.  The lack of syrupy mouthfeel keeps the experience from building upon itself until it’s demise.  Each sip is its own reward.  “Each sip is its own reward”... man that was good!  Put that on a bottle then sell a million, then give me 15%.

So even though the review you just read is rather simplistic, in the case of O-So it works.  It’s two simple flavors that are paired and play well together.  Bottom line is that if you like butterscotch or root beer you’ll like this soda.

~A

This was purchased at a Shell Gas Station


Hippo Size Jumbo Root Beer

/

Hippo Size has proven to be quite the tasty beverage maker so I figured giving the root beer a try wouldn’t be the worst of ideas.  Jumbo Root Beer is the official name of the soda at hand and it sits in a stout little 12oz bottle.  Sweetened with cane sugar and flavored with artificial and natural goodness it awaits consumption.

With an aroma that makes me think “bite” more than “cream” I’m starting to get a feel for what Jumbo Root Beer will be about.  There is a definite wintergreen scent as well which makes sense as it’s listed within the ingredients.  

I don’t know if I’m right about this, but I’m guessing the mouthfeel will be foamy and fun.

In terms of mouthfeel it’s not foamy or fun, in fact it was kind of boring.  Fortunately the flavor is the primary focus of the beverage although a good mouthfeel get you extra points.

The aforementioned wintergreen plays a rather important part in this play as it’s quite dominate on my palate.  This level of wintergreen might be a bit too much for some, but all in all it works well in the root beer.  If you do end up trying it you might enjoy the rooty flavor that hides behind the wintergreen mask.  It’s strong enough to give the soda a mild personality.

While the flavor is smooth it’s lacking in any sort of cream taste that you might expect in some root beers.  It still goes down easily with little bite, but honestly I want to feel more emotion from this bottle.  Hippo Size Jumbo Root Beer is the equivalent of a polite “hi” that you reserve for people you don’t know, but they work in the same building as you.

Hippo Size Jumbo Root Beer is slightly above average in taste, but overwhelmingly average if not a little lower in many of the other drink arenas.  I’m left kind of empty, unlike the bottle in front of me, after drinking it.  Perhaps I hyped up the Hippo Size name a little too fast.

~A

This was purchased at a Shell Gas Station

SiouxCity Root Beer

/

I’m on a time crunch and only have 23 minutes to write this review.  It may be a suprise to you that it normally takes me around 30 minutes to write one… sometimes longer if I interact with people.  I’ll count the number of people I talk to while writing this to give you an idea.

One.

Drink enough of anything and you'll start to see tiny, orange, wheeled hippos.

Today’s review is Sioux City Root Beer and looks to be an ok product.  It has a cowboy on the label enjoying a frosty mug of whoknowswhat.  It’s made with cane sugar and sits in a fairly stout bottle that might remind some of years past.  A nice simple brown bottle cap sits atop the beverage and in…

Two.

..vites me to open it.

If you know what IBC Root Beer smells like you already know what Sioux City Root Beer smells like.  For those who aren’t in the know it’s a rooty aroma with some cream to it’s name.  Not overly sweet by any means, but I’m sure it’ll taste just fine.

Three.

Four.

As an aside, this is one of the heaviest bottles I’ve drank from to date.  It feels nice and sturdy.  Reliable.  Safe.  Great crash test ratings.

Five.

Again, for those of you who’ve had IBC Root Beer this tastes like a cleaner version of that.  Once again, for those of you who hav...

Six.

...en’t I’ll describe is as usual.

Sioux City Root Beer favors the “bite” category rather than the “cream”.

Seven.

So those of you who are into a smooth mouth feel might be a little disappointed in this soda.  The rooty aroma I mentioned earlier translates easily into the taste and is especially noticed in the aftertaste.  Obviously there is carbonation, but other than backing up the “bite” every now and again it’s not really a huge part of the experience.  All in all it’s a good root beer, but doesn’t do a lot to push itself ahead of the pack and get noticed… aside from the heavy bottle.  

Eight.

Nine.

So if you like root beer give it a go, if you love root beer then you’ve probably already had it and...

Ten.

… have developed your own opinions of it.

There you have it, I’m done with the review and talked to ten people.  That’s pretty good for me, but then again this is probably a fairly generic review from me.  

It’s a lot of fun being able to drink a soda and tell people about it as they pass you by.  Not that 5% of them will buy it, but at least they know that there’s more out there than what BIGSODA tells them about.

So thanks to all that stopped by, your existence has been reduced to a number between 1-10.

This was given to me by STUN3R

HEB Old Fashioned Root Beer

/

So after the last HEB soda SNAFU I’ve checked and double checked to make sure I haven’t reviewed HEB Old Fashioned Root Beer.  Guess what?  I haven’t!  This means I can continue this review with a clear conscience.  

HEB Old Fashioned Root Beer is sweetened with pure cane sugar and I’m guessing has a pop cap which I will now have to remove.  Do you think this will be a “bite” root beer or a “cream” root beer?  My guess is cream.

Judging by the smell it’s more of a “bite” root beer than a “cream”.  Don’t you just love how I’ve now created two sub-categories of root beer.  Let’s go ahead and make these the standard.

I'm not quite sure what's happening in this picture.

I'm not quite sure what's happening in this picture.

Hurray, this is a “bite”!  Hurray, this is… a fairly average root beer.  Eh, now that I say that the aftertaste is really shining through as a positive.  HEB Old Fashioned Root Beer has a good amount of flavor with minimal syrupy mouth feel.  The carbonation levels are fizzy and fun.  A barrage of larger bubbles flowing over my tongue and teeth, bursting into a smaller more intense fizz.

As I said prior, this is a “bite” root beer where the initial taste sizzles in your mouth just a little.  Let’s you know you’re alive.  As the journey progresses the soda attempts to transform into a “cream” or at least tries to be somewhat smooth.  This transition isn’t exactly flawless as the bite never fully allows for it.

All in all though, HEB Old Fashioned Root Beer is still average by my count.  I like that it’s sugar sweetened and I like that it’s in a glass bottle.  I don’t like that it’s called “Old Fashioned” yet has potassium benzoate and artificial flavors.  That said it’s still worth picking up a bottle to try for yourself.

~A

This was purchased at an HEB grocery store

Old Red Eye Root Beer

/

As I’ve stated before, a quick way to make me excited about a soda is to give it a snazzy western theme.  Old Red Eye Root Beer (Since 1948 for those who care) does a pretty great job in western theming in the name alone.  The label looks like it would feel more at home as restaurant signage, but that’s fantastic in its own right.  

Just like the cowboys were, Old Red Eye is sweetened with cane sugar and include a dash of chemicals.  You’re correct in thinking that comparison to cowboys didn’t make any sense, however I’m betting you’ll forget about that by the end of the review.

That's not Twist in the background that's potential copyright infringement. I think I'm gonna reach out to the photographer now.

Smells like root beer.  I even had a random passer by smell the bottle and those were his exact words.  It does have a little hint of wintergreen to it, but it took a couple of huffs to sniff that one out.

Wow, that has quite a bit of wintergreen in it.  While a bit too powerful for my liking the strength of the wintergreen thankfully does not mask the actual root beer I set out to enjoy.  Each time I raise the bottle to my lips it’s like a punch in the mouth.  First with the wintergreen left and then with the root beer right.  A carbonated uppercut is what follows to try and knock me out and it probably could if the flavor was richer.  

Other than the wintergreen taste my only complain is that the flavor seems thin.  Please don’t take this to mean it’s not flavorful.  I’d compare it to a wall that needs a second coat of paint.  Sure the wall is painted and bright, but it could be so much richer and vibrant.

All in all (as I seem to type more and more at this point of the review) Old Red Eye Root Beer is serviceable and would be a decent grab if you found it at a gas station.

~A

This soda was purchased at a Shell Gasoline Station

OH WAIT THERE'S TOTALLY A STORY ABOUT A BULL ON THE LABEL!

"Legend has it, there was a craggy old bull named Red Eye - with a glint and a gnarly attitude, he could only be coaxed from his pen to do his daily duties when a brave soul would pop open a bottle of his favorite root beer, pour it in his tin bowl, then run like heck before being stomped.  Red Eye preferred his root beer frosty cold."

Ok, there you have it.  I couldn't finish the review without including the story.

Dang! That’s Good Butterscotch Root Beer

/

I’m pretty sure I love butterscotch root beer.  I haven’t had many of them, but the ones I have had were delightful.  A smooth creamy texture that would put most any cream soda to shame, the mouthfeel of these tasty beverages is one of the biggest selling points in my book.  So of course I picked up a bottle of Dang! That’s Good Butterscotch Root Beer when I saw it.  I mean Dang! who wouldn’t?  

Twist has a Dang! Shirt, but he won't let me wear it.

A buttery scotchy aroma moves easily from the mouth of the bottle.  In terms of odor it seems that the root beer takes the back seat while your grandpa’s butterscotch has taken the wheel.  I kind of hope that’s how the flavor plays out as well.

Don’t you love it when you drink from the bottle and the bubbles create that unique bass beat as they move toward the back?  I’m not sure I described that well enough to convey what I’m trying to get across, but I think it’s a pretty great event.

The initial sip tastes of butterscotch and root beer equally.  There is no fighting for first, they just both showed up at the same time and smiled.  As the seconds pass by my gaze shifts to root beer as he tries to get noticed, but it’s not too long that butterscotch eventually pushes root beer to the side and stands there like nothing happened.  While I can hear root beer crying, he’s now out of view so I’m not as affected.  Then as butterscotch stands there smiling he eventually throws up on my shoes.

Ok, so that comparison went a little haywire at the end.  I’ll just say it the boring way.  The beverage creates an initial root beer butterscotch taste which isn’t amazing but works.  The root beer taste becomes a bit more noticeable as time passes, but eventually the richness of the butterscotch overpowers it.  The longer the butterscotch lingers the more it tastes of chemicals until I have to follow up with another swig to reset the process.  See, that wasn’t so confusing.

All in all Dang! That’s Good Butterscotch Root Beer is indeed that...good.  It’s not stellar or amazing, it’s good and it has some weak points as mentioned above.  If you see one, grab one and try it for yourself.  I doubt you’ll be sorry.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Cicero Beverage Company Salted Caramel Root Beer

/

Whenever I review a beverage with a particularly lengthy name I always make mention of it.  Today will be no different as I review Cicero Beverage Company’s Salted Caramel Root Beer which will from hereon be called CBCSCRB which will from here on be called SCRB or Scrub.  Now I don’t mean to be a Creep, but I just don’t feel like typing all that out over and over again.  Scrub’s label has that “burnt western paper” look to it, but also includes a picture of a fully realized city on it.  Kind of a mixed message if you ask me, but you didn’t.  This fully realized city has a river of caramel running through it which eventually flows out onto the singed western paper.  

Now it seems to me that salted caramel is seeing a rise in popularity.  Hands Up if you’ve noticed this too.  I’ve personally seen it in a few different food locations with my favorite being salted caramel peanuts.  If you haven’t tried said peanuts you need to.  This peanut experience has taught me that I enjoy salted caramel.  Coupled with the fact that I enjoy root beer tells me I should also enjoy Scrub.

Looking at the ingredients I see that Scrub is sweetened with sugar and also has a bit of salt in it as well.  Seeing salt makes me think three things.  That’s Crazy.  That’s Sexy.  That’s Cool.  Crazy because who puts salt in a soda.  Sexy because they put salt in a soda and that shows they’re willing to take risks.  Cool because...well mostly the same reasons for Sexy.  Enough Girl Talk, let me just open this already while it’s still Chilli.

The aroma received isn’t all that strong a smell.  I had to sharply inhale to even get the root beer scent to register.  Waaaaay in the back of the club you can kind of see Salted Caramel through all the smoke.  At least I think that’s him.  Perhaps I’d better take a close look.  

Wow, Scrub has an incredibly light mouth feel.  That’s insane how foamy each sip is.  It’s not to the point of being Unpretty, but it’s a little off putting.  What’s odd is that the beverage doesn’t create much of a head within the bottle.  

Twist has chased a lot of Waterfalls, but thinks a caramel one would be pretty easy to run down.

As for the salted caramel taste, well it’s very light and I’m somewhat disappointed in that.  I’d rather the disgusting in your face (literally) taste of an overly done salted caramel than something so subtle it hardly even registers.  Now as you know, I Ain’t too Proud to Beg so PLEASE someone make a salted caramel root beer where the salt just walks in with a swagger and sits on your tongue daring you to not like it.  I would send so much Fanmail if someone could pull that off.

Even with that complaint, Scrub still tastes pretty dang good.  The root beer that’s used is a solid foundation on what could have been a knock it out of the park kind of drink.  Here is where the incredibly foamy mouth feel helps set it apart from other root beers.  Even though it does a great job at being a root beer I will lower the ranking some because I don’t believe the listed taste is represented well enough in the product.

So, what is a Scrub.  A Scrub is a soda that gets some love from me...due to the reasons listed above.  Should you pick up a pack?  Only if you find it during some Red Light Special.  Personally I think you’d be fine… (elipses for suspense)

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Dang! That’s Good Root Beer

/

I don’t even know what Dang! That’s Good Root Beer (henceforth called DTGRB) even tastes like, but I don’t care.  I want shirt with this logo on it regardless of how the review turns out.  Looking at the ingredients I already see one more reason to like it.  DTGRB is sweetened with sugar; what a novel concept.  It’s a fairly simple bottle, so let’s make this a fairly simple review.

Wow! That's a Handsome Iguana

After removing the snazzy cap I’m greeted with a creamy root beer aroma that has a sharpness to it.  Perhaps some licorice was used in the making of DTGRB.  Either way, the scent says the taste will be more complex than I initially thought.

Here’s a slightly most honest name for root beer at hand.  Hey! That Root Beer is Pretty Good.  Seriously though, it’s a fairly tasty beverage.  The beginning of each sip includes a quick shock of fizz and bite.  This transforms swiftly into a sweet, silky root beer that reminds my tastebuds of melted caramel.

The aftertaste lingers for quite a while as DTGRB seems to sit a bit heavy on the tongue.  It’s a pleasant flavor though so I have no complaints regarding it.  All in all DTGRB is an above average root beer, but nothing more than that.    What makes it stand out is the name.  The flavor, while enjoyable, will get lost in a sea of other root beers that I’ve tried.  That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try it though.  You should buy multiples of this and see for yourself.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Anchor Ginger Root Beer

/

As the old saying goes, “Red sky at night, sailors delight.  Red sky at morning, sailors take warning”.  As the even older saying goes, “Red cap on bottle, push it full throttle.  Anchor on label, thar be turned tables”.  So obviously I wanted to introduce Anchor Ginger Root Beer in a fun way and I failed spectacularly.  I’m ok with this because I’m about to review a cane sugar sweetened ginger root beer.  

What I’m not ok with is the fact that a sailboat is on the label instead of a proper pirate ship.  They use the words “Sea Dogs” and “Scallywags” on the label, but a sailboat is the picture they chose?  So odd.  Hopefully they made better decisions when picking out the flavors.

Twist is two thirds pirate and one third sail boat.  You heard me.

The aroma is mostly that of root beer.  It’s a creamier root beer scent to be more precise, with ginger hanging waaaaaay in the background.  I’m thinking it would be best if he could overcome his shyness and move a little closer to center stage.

Well, ginger decided he was best fit being a bush behind a tree.  Granted, the bottle says that it has a “soothing touch of ginger’ which is exactly what I’m tasting.  I’m also finding out that my nose was correct in thinking that this would be a creamier root beer.  Anchor Ginger Root Beer goes down smooth, with just a hiccup of electricity at the finish.  This hiccup is caused by that bush behind the tree and the low but persistent carbonation within the bottle.  

The flavor, while good, will eventually be forgotten as there is nothing in particular that stands out about this soda.  It’s an above average root beer with a great name.  Perhaps if they could coax that bush behind the tree to at least have a musical number they’d have something better.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Begley's and Bill's Root Beer

/

Sugar.  Free.  Root.  Beer.  I’ve never ever had a good one, but something tells me that Begley’s and Bill’s Root Beer is going to finally give me what I’ve not really been searching for.  You see Begley’s and Bill’s uses something they like to call SweetenFX which is their proprietary blend of stevia and erythritol.  All of their sodas are sweetened with it and their cola and cream sodas taste pretty dang good.  Today is uncharted territory though.  I attribute diet/sugar free root beer to poison.  Something important always seems to be missing.  Let’s see if SweetenFX can fill in for that missing puzzle piece.

If it looks like a diet root beer and quacks like a diet root beer... it much be a duck!

If it looks like a diet root beer and quacks like a diet root beer... it much be a duck!

Ok, so the aroma is a little odd.  Like all the B&B sodas I’ve tried the scent is faint, but can be discovered with a little rooting around.  I can’t tell if it’s a burst of vanilla I’m getting or if this sweetening process is finally catching up to B&B.

It’s not poison, that’s for sure, but this entry into the soda market isn’t as strong as their previous two had been.  Let me preface all of this by saying it’s the best diet root beer I’ve had and that includes Virgil’s Zero.  With that out of the way I’ll tell you that the first third of each sip is very promising and enjoyable.  It’s sweet, it’s rooty, it’s good.

That quickly fades into the next leg of the experience where that initial flavor goes away and you can taste the “diet”.  It’s drier than a root beer should be at this point and even though it’s all natural a chemical taste becomes known.  It’s not something I’m sticking my tongue out over, but it’s noticeable enough to give me pause.

After this fades you’re left with an aftertaste that’s neither pleasant nor terrible.  In fact it taste a little like diet maple syrup.  Throughout this process the carbonation is slowly walking around in the background not really caring if he’s noticed or not.  Now it’s my opinion that root beer can benefit from strong or weak carbonation, but B&B Root Beer needs to add a bit more.

So there you have it.  While Begley’s and Bill’s Root Beer is still the best sugar free root beer I’ve tasted it still has it’s flaws.  It tastes alright and isn’t poison, so it’s got that going for it.

~A

This soda supplied to us by Begley’s and Bill’s

 

Honest Fizz Root Beer

/

Well there has been some delay in reviews as of recent and I promise you it’s for good reason.  This Jerk now has a tiny Jerk of his own to take care of.  So there’s my excuse, hopefully you’ll take it.  Now perhaps you’ll think my excuse was fabricated when I tell you the next drink I had in line was an organic, stevia sweetened, zero calorie root beer.  That’d be pretty low to make up a tiny Jerk just to postpone reviewing a diet root beer.

Don't worry, Twist told me the correct location eventually.  It's his establishment after all. 

 It worries me a bit to review this as I’ve never personally found any enjoyment out of “diet” root beer.  In fact I compare it to poison when the subject comes up.  Perhaps the stevia will add a little something I’ve never experienced before, but I’m still leery.  Oh, the name of the drink at hand is Honest Fizz Root Beer.  If you’ve been keeping up you’ll know that this is the fourth Honest Fizz beverage I’ve tried with mixed results.  As long as they stick to citrus soda they seem to do alright; it’s when they dabble in the brown sodas that their weakness is shown.  Who am I to jump to conclusions though?  Let me find out for myself.

After opening the scent off the can could hold its own with any root beer on the market.  There’s nothing scary or off putting at all.  Just two nostrils full of vanilla goodness telling me I’m ready.  Hopefully  my tongue gets into the same show that my nose told just told him about.

My nose was telling a half truth.  There was indeed a “place in France where the pretty ladies dance”, but no “hole in the wall for the men to see it all”.  For half of the sip I was there in France, I was sold, I was convinced that I was in the right place.  For half of the sip it was creamy, foamy, and right up there with your major players like Barq’s and the like.  The second half of the sip is when this imagined wall came tumbling down taking its hole with it.  It went from high hopes to bowl of nopes in about two seconds. 

Now bitter and dry, pulling away any taste of creamy vanilla I had once experienced.  It’s like I’m drinking root beer flavored seltzer water.  Each time I try and recreate the first half of the sip my trip is cut shorter and shorter until I’m just standing in Paris looking like a scammed tourist.  Why did I allow myself to get scammed?  I’ve never had a good sugar free root beer.  What made me think this would be any different?  Well at least I got to see Disneyland Paris.

~A

This soda supplied to us by Honest Fizz

Pure Sodaworks Root Beer #4

/

A few weeks ago the fine folks at Pure Sodaworks sent me a six pack sampler of soda.  Thankfully, one of the most difficult decisions I make is which soda to drink first when I’ve never reviewed one from a particular brand.  The way I usually tackle this issue is to try their root beer or cola first.  It’s with those two flavors that the attention to detail can really be appreciated.  For instance, Pure Sodaworks has a Strawberry Jalapeno flavor that I’m dying to try.  That wacky flavor combination is already hyping up the brand for me, but I want to see what they can do with a flavor that everyone makes… root beer.  To be specific this is Root Beer #4, I have no idea why it’s Root Beer #4 it just is.

Looking at the coloration of the beverage it’s lighter than I’d think a root beer would be, but I do see some sediment at the bottom of the bottle so I’m excited about that.  Looking at the ingredients list I see that this contains Sparkling Water, Pure Cane Sugar, Molasses, Herbs and Spices, and Citric Acid.  That my friends is a 100% Natural Root Beer.  No sodium benzoate or artificial flavors to be found here.  Lighter color be darned, I’m ready to find out what made #4 so much better than numbers one through three.

I upend the bottle to swirl around the spices.  The scent that gently wafts from the mouth is one of the most unique root beer scents I’ve experienced to date.  It’s a root beer that smells like Christmas.  The aroma is something I would like to duplicate in a potpourri, but at the same time it’s pushing me to consume it as a rapid pace.  Since I don’t have the time for arts and crafts today, I guess I’ll just have to drink it.

I just typed two curse words and deleted them.  This is amazing root beer.  This is possibly the best first sip I’ve ever taken and I’m ready to go back for more.   Molasses seeps into each sip keeping me grounded in the fact that this is indeed a root beer and not just a hodge podge of spice and flavor.  What I can only assume is ginger swirls about and creates the lightest of burns with each sip taken.  It’s just enough to keep my mouth alive and aware of what’s happening.  The more I drink it though the harder the molasses has to work as the initial root beer flavoring is vanishing as all the other flavors present begin to build on one another.  This tastes less and less like a root beer and more like sweet spiced tea.  How is this metamorphosis even possible?  I guess if a caterpillar can become a butterfly then root beer to tea isn’t that much of a stretch.

Twist is baffled... at least I think he is.

We’ve reached an odd point in the review.  I’ve never had a root beer transform into tea about halfway through the bottle.  Within my last few sips I couldn’t even recognize that it was a root beer at all. Even the aftertaste is that of spiced tea… so very bizarre. 

While it was playing the role of Root Beer #4 the flavors were both unique and familiar.  The carbonation was at just the right level of fun and the whole thing seemed like it was destined for our highest rating.  Then the breakdown occurred.   A blurry line stood between root beer and spiced tea, with the latter taking out the former with the skill of an assassin.  I don’t know how that happened, but the drink was good.  Confusing, but still very good.  With that said I definitely recommend this to all.  You’ll taste a beverage unlike any other and you’ll be a better person for it.

~A

This soda supplied to us by Pure Sodaworks

Jack Black's Dead Red Root Beer

/

For the third time available in 420 years, it’s Jack Black’s Dead Red Root Beer by Real Soda.  While I may not always enjoy Real Soda’s selection of beverages, I can’t say they don’t take great pride in their labeling.  According to the bottle, “once you’ve had jack black you’ll never go back!”  That is unless of course we’re speaking of the actor and you’ve just watched Gulliver’s Travels.  Dead Red Root Beer is one of the few caffeinated root beers I’ve seen to date.  It’s also sweetened with cane sugar, has a touch of Brazilian Guarana and good ol’ fashioned sodium benzoate!  Thankfully the color of this root beer is as advertised, red.  How embarrassing would it have been if the drink inside wasn’t what the label claimed?  Yarr well, I guess it’s time for a review. 

There is a pleasant rooty aroma that escapes the bottle upon opening.  Beneath the bottle cap it teaches how to properly toast a bottle of Jack Black.  I say “skull” and you’ll respond with “crossbones”.  Ready!

Twist is the third incarnation of the Dread Pirate Roberts

I’ll assume you said “crossbones” prior to this sentence as I did indeed say “skull”.  I didn’t type it because the bottle cap clearly states that I say it.  The root beer itself is quite nice.  There’s a bit of a peppery kick at the end of each sip I take that shook my tongue awake.  More creamy than sharp, Jack Black’s Dead Red Root Beer starts off as an above average beverage and only improves as you drink it due to the use of “natural and artificial flavors”.  I really wish I knew what they were, but whatever they are it’s working.  This has the sort of spice sensation that you’d find in eggnog and since we’re smack dab in the middle of the holiday season I appreciate it even more.

Carbonation levels are good as they don’t intrude on the consumption experience at all.  Yes they are noticeable, but they create a fun mouth feel that will have you looking forward to the next sip.  While I am praising Jack Black’s Dead Red Root Beer there’s nothing about it that makes me want to buy this in droves.  The ingredient list is indeed above average and that creates an above average taste… nothing more.  So I tip my hat to you Pirate Black and recommend the Carbo-Nation do the same.

~A(ye) Aye

 

 

Hank's Root Beer

/

I’ve had a few of the Hank’s line of sodas before, but there’s just something about the phrase “Hank’s Root Beer” that works out really well.  Hank sounds like a root beer making fool.  Someone who probably started tinkering with it in his kitchen until friends requested it by name.  “Hey, have you tried any of Hank’s root beer?”  “I’m making a stop in Greenville on the way to Springtown.  Yeah, of course I’m stopping by Hank’s place.  His root beer is great.”  See?  All of that seems really natural.  I really wish that this was just called Hank’s Root Beer, but the full name is sadly “Genuine Hank’s Gourmet Philadelphia Recipe Root Beer”.  That’s far too complicated.  Thankfully though, the overly long name doesn’t change the fact that this is a root beer made with cane sugar.  Not “pure cane sugar” or “100% natural cane sugar”, just cane sugar.  At least they kept that simple.

Twist was the 2nd mayor of Philly.

The scent that comes off of the bottle upon opening shares the aroma qualities you’d find in a creamy root beer while simultaneously smelling like a root beer with some bite.  I’ve learned when these two properties share a home that the one that bites is usually the winner in the taste contest on your tongue.  Let’s find out if that’s the case.

Hank’s Root Beer does have a bit of a punch to it as I thought it would, but I was incorrect in thinking the aggressive side of the root beer would overshadow the creaminess.  There is a vanilla backdrop that hangs there during the entire act as both “Creamy” and “Bitey” act out their parts on stage.  Since “Bitey’s” mom dressed him in the same color as the backdrop, it’s “Creamy” that ultimately steals the show.  Which is the worse name for an actual child, Creamy or Bitey?  Anywho, the smooth sensation of vanilla coupled with the ultimately creamy mouth feel of this root beer really make it a beverage to try.  The sweetness level tastes like it’s on the higher end of the spectrum, but it’s nothing that makes your teeth feel like they’re going to rot out of your mouth if you drink a bottle or two.  I’m quite pleased with this bottle of Hank’s Root Beer.  It doesn’t do anything particularly amazing, but what it does do it does very well.

~A

 

 

RootJack

/

The folks at RootJack told the folks at ThirstMonger to tell me to drink RootJack without ice at an extremely cold temperature…purple monkey dishwasher.  I’m pretty sure the part about the purple monkey dishwasher was something added along the line, but needless to say I was quite pleased to see a beverage company tell me to stay away from ice.  So for a week this bottle of RootJack, Orange Flavored Root Beer, sat at the back of my fridge chilling.  Everytime I’d open the door I’d want to reach in and drink it, but I couldn’t… I must wait.  How does one keep oneself from drinking such an ususual product?  Orange flavored Root Beer, I’d never heard of such a thing, but my mind tells me it should work.  Looking at the label I’m happy to see that RootJack is sweetened with sugar and also contains a bit of guarana seed extract for energy.  This fun hybrid of flavors also has 100% of the vitamin C I need in a day, to fight scurvy of course.  With that said, it’s time for me to crack open this bottle and set sail for nowheres in particulars.

The scent that rises from the depths of Davy Jones locker is root beer heavy with a hint of the orange promised on the front of the bottle.  Do you know what a pirate’s favorite letter is?  You probably think it’s RRRRRRR, but he truly lives for the C.  Moving on.

TWist is better known at the Dread Pirate Roberts.

That is super bizarre.  Wow.  The first few glugs were just straight root beer, but then the citrus took hold of my taste buds and punched them square in the jaw.  The hint of orange the aroma spoke about was just the tip of the krackens tentacle.  I thought that RootJack would be root beer with a hint of orange.  I thought wrong as each sip starts off like calm day at sea; just enjoying a root beer with my swabbies, then the orange whale throws itself on board looking for Ahab.  It’s really confusing for my mouth and brain.  Each is frantically trying to figure out if it’s ok with this mixture of worlds. 

The sweetness level of RootJack is just right as I would have no problem drinking this with a meal.  While the flavor is wild, I still feel like it could pair well with your standard fare of hamburgers and hotdogs without taking away anything from them.  I’m also seeing why they wanted me to drink this cold.  The orange flavor could come off as offending to some if this was room temperature.  Even the bottle tells you to “Serve Cold”.  When’s the last time you saw another soda tell you the obvious? 

As the soda bottle empties the orange flavor becomes a bit more bitter, but not enough to turn me away from finishing it off.  Now that I have a proper place to put my message written on parchment, I’ll give you my final thoughts.  RootJack is truly a unique beverage from start to finish.  The mixture of two common flavors may confuse the mind to the point of not knowing if what you’re ingesting is something you like or not, but once you get your mind right you’ll find you wish you had another.  I’ve gotta hand it  to RootJack for taking a chance and setting themselves apart from the rest of the sodas out there.  The flavor combo was a little too combative for my tastes, but I still want to recommend that you buy multiples if just for giving some to your friends.

~A

Barrel Brothers Root Beer

/

Two guys dressed in barrels pose for a caricature of themselves.  Apparently they loved it so much they decided the picture would look great on a bottle of root beer.  These two guys I’m speaking of are the Barrel Brothers, and I will be consuming their soda today.  The label gives me no history of Barrel Brothers Root Beer, but it does tell me that this is from the makers of Apple Beer.  Apple Beer if you remember had the potential to be amazing, but faltered.  Here’s hoping the Barrel Brothers, Mac and Jack (two names I made up), do themselves proud with their product.  It’s a HFCS sweetened root beer so it’s not off to a great start in that department, although that doesn’t mean the taste can’t overcome the ingredients.

Twist was once a brother, but there could be only one.

A pleasant vanilla aroma with a hint of marshmallow rises from the bottle.  I’m quickly forgetting I ever saw HFCS on the label at all.  Perhaps the taste will completely wash that memory away.

That’s good root beer.  That’s really good root beer.  The scent translates directly into the taste as each sip is smothered with the smooth sensation of vanilla.  The vanilla flavor is so rich that it made me forget I was drinking a root beer for a brief moment.  At the end of each sip though the root beer rises from the foamy grave and grasps at the roof of my mouth, biting it with carbonation and a tasty root beer taste.  Barrel Brothers Root Beer would pair very well with ice cream as the licorice/wintergreen flavors you might find in other root beers are absent.  This is strictly about the vanilla, almost marshmallow, sensations mixed with an already good root beer.  It doesn’t build on itself that much which is surprising to me given the richness of it.  If I must pick nits about this soda there is a slight chemical taste that arises occasionally, but it’s not enough for me to shoo anyone away.  All in all, Barrel Brothers Root Beer is a treat that any root beer enthusiast would enjoy.  No, it’s not made from the greatest ingredients, but the flavor more than makes up for it.

~A

 

Rocket Fizz Root Beer Float

/

In the infantile days of this site (I believe we were still on LiveJournal) we reviewed A&W Root Beer Float in a bottle.  I think the word that got tossed around a lot was “rancid” which left us a bit gun shy to try another Root Beer Float in a bottle.  Thankfully Rocket Fizz has such a beverage and since they rarely steer me wrong I have no worries about trying it.  Rocket Fizz Root Beer Float may not be the bees knees, but I can almost guarantee you that I won’t use the word “rancid” in its description.  Of course it’s sweetened with pure cane sugar, but after that the ingredients become a bit to chemical or vague (natural/artificial flavors) to really care enough to go into detail.  So my expectations are set carefully above “awful”… something tells me it will easily surpass them.

My nose has a hard time recognizing the “float” scent that should be coming out of the mouth of the bottle.  Of course this could easily be the result of a high level of grass pollen in the air that occasionally renders my nose useless.  I can smell a rich and sugary root beer flavor with something different in the background.  Hopefully the “ice cream” will arrive once I take a swig.

Well it’s a heck of a lot better than A&W’s version of the same flavor.  The root beer taste is burly and easily experienced, but the vanilla ice cream never shows up to the party… a different visitor must have stolen his invitation.  Roasted marshmallow is the secondary flavor in this soda and he’s quite brash about his presence.  You’d think that someone who was not invited to a shin did would show a bit of cowardice, but not R.M.  He kicked the door open, announced his arrival, spit on the floor, and kissed root beer’s sister.  It’s like he knows he doesn’t belong, but doesn’t care because he’s sure he’ll win you over… and he’s right.  I really did want to try a good root beer float soda, but with every sip of root beer and roasted marshmallow I care less and less that the ice cream taste is absent.  It’s an odd combination on virtual paper that works like gangbusters in my mouth.  Perhaps I should retool that last sentence, better not as then this sentence wouldn’t make any sense. 

Are there faults to Rocket Fizz Root Beer Float?  Well aside from the fact that it doesn’t exactly taste as the label states, yes there are.  The root beer flavor, while good, could be richer, creamier, just better in general for one.  A somewhat syrupy mouth feel is my last impression of the beverage.  I wouldn’t say it’s the velvet curtain I so often describe, but perhaps a sheer curtain used for fog effects.  All in all Rocket Fizz Root Beer Float is something out of the ordinary and I suggest you buy multiples to share.

~A

Rocket Fizz Root Beer Float580.JPG

Twist is a Rocket Fizz Man, burning up his fuse up here alone.