Strawberry Shasta

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Here’s something odd, well at least I find it odd.  I’ve never had a Shasta soda that I can remember.  It’s Shasta!  How have I lived 31 years and never had one.  The mascot of one of our local universities is named Shasta, yet trying the drink has eluded me.  I’m not exactly sure how a mascot’s name and me trying a soda tie in together, but that doesn’t matter when it’s something as silly as this.  A nice lady I work with, whom I will name Good Morning, put me on a mission to find Strawberry Shasta.  Upon searching for it I found that the only places near me that sold Shasta were Brookshire Bros. grocery stores.  Now I’m not sure how it is where you live, but around here Brookshire Bros. are located in more rural areas so I rarely see one.  Well, Good Morning was driving past one by chance and made the U-turn to check it out.  Long story somewhat shorter, she brought me a Shasta Strawberry to review. 

Glancing at the ingredients I quickly see that Shasta Strawberry is chock full of chemical goodness.  I wasn’t expecting anything amazing here, so my thoughts have not been swayed.  This can art is keeping me in a positive mood.  It feels so fun and retro while keeping the can fresh and eye-catching.  Hopefully the flavor is on the fun side.

Twist smells of strawberries.

It smells of strawberry soda.  Ok, a little more detail is necessary.  It’s not quite as sugary smelling as I thought it would be, but the chemical mixture inside keeps it from smelling like fresh strawberries or any nonsense like that.

Wow, color me somewhat slightly impressed.  Shasta Strawberry, even with 36 grams of sugar in it, doesn’t taste a sugar sandwich made with sugar, marshmallows, sugar, sugar, and some strawberry syrup.  No, in fact this tastes merely like sugar, carbonated water, and strawberry syrup which oddly enough is a step in the right direction for strawberry sodas.  Enough blabbering, this tastes like the carbonated version of those little strawberry candies your grandmother bought back in 1985.  If you want to buy over five pounds of these candies or just want to know what I’m talking about click this fabulous link.  Anywho, these strawberry candies (and Strawberry Shasta) have the talent of chemically mimicking both the tart and sweet aspects of our friend the strawberry.  It is this feature that allows me to gently nudge Shasta Strawberry past its numerous counterparts.

~A

 

Lean - Yella

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Today’s offering from ThirstMonger is a relaxation beverage.  Currently I don’t need a relaxation beverage because my wife is listening to one of the dullest power point presentations I’ve ever half listened to.  Ah, education.  Thankfully, I can focus all my attention on this can of Lean (flavor “Yella”) in front of me.  ThirstMonger sent me three flavors of Lean: Purp, Easta Pink, and of course Yella.  Having reviewed other relaxation beverages I had grown tired of the whole “purple drank” variation and was pleased to see that Lean offered other non “Purp” flavors for those that craved more variety from their chillaxation beverages.  Lean is labeled as the “slow motion…potion”.  Even their tagline has an ellipsis in it, this must be good.  I wasn’t all that shocked to see melatonin in the ingredient list, but I was surprised to see sugar.  I would have thought they’d have gone the HFCS route, but I’m happily wrong about that.  The band around the top of the can gives us the flavor title of “Yella”, but also includes tiny pictures of pineapples.  I’m not sure what I would have assumed the flavor of “Yella” was without this picture cue, so I’m pleased it exists.

Twist is always leaning.  Always.

An unusual pineapple cream aroma races out of the can, almost desperate for me to smell it.  There’s an unexpected amount of sweetness in this scent so I’m a bit more curious as to what Lean – Yella will taste like. 

Yella tastes as it smells.  There is a sweet, smooth, pineapple taste that washes over all aspects of my mouth.  The carbonation is small, but shows up in powerful bursts throughout the drinking process.  Even though there are tiny pineapples on this can, I’m quite pleased with the fact that “Pineapple” is not listed as the flavor.  While it is the primary taste I’m experiencing it has been mutated into something much more interesting than your standard apple of pine.  The sweetness, that I’ve now mentioned several times, is quite similar to what you might find in a cream soda.  There’s also a bit of vanilla within this pineapple soda.  This addition keeps each swig somewhat fresh and allows for repeated returns to the beverage.  On the negative side, Lean – Yella is somewhat syrupy and some might find it overly sugary.  There are only 28 grams of sugar in a serving which may sound like a lot, but Mountain Dew is made with a number that travels well over 40g.  This sweetness does build upon itself making it difficult to finish off this 16oz can, but all in all it’s a fairly tasty beverage.  The rating I give it may seem a little low, but just know it’s on the high end.

~A

 

Faygo Orange

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Orange soda is one of the staple sodas out there when you’re talking about the fruit flavored variety.  Personally I prefer grape to orange, but there aren’t many times I’d turn down an orange soda.  This cane sugar sweetened Faygo Orange in front of me has been dressed up in a simply stylish glass bottle and begs for review.  A quick peak at the back tells me that the ingredients aren’t really worth mentioning and I should be on my way with this review.

As seen here, Twist sleeps with his eyes open

Your standard orange aroma escapes the bottle top and does nothing to impress me.  That said, the flavor inside will hopefully hold a few tricks up its sleeve, less I grow bored with it as well.

A quick punch of carbonation and the rest is a sweet burst of orange that identifies more with candy than fruit.  This sweet, somewhat syrupy beverage has already taken a somewhat permanent residence in my mouth.  The velvet curtain, which is usually reserved for beverages sweetened with HFCS, has fallen and it’s all I can do not to taste this rather ordinary orange soda.  Faygo Orange isn’t something many would describe as “poor tasting”, but it’s somewhat yawn worthy.  I’d much rather purchase the store brand orange soda and take my chance with the HFCS if it meant getting a more vibrant flavor. 

~A

 

 

Almdudler

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Moxie is the official state soft drink of Maine; it’s rather important up there.  I think it’s pretty darn nifty that a state has an official soft drink.  Heck, I wish all states had one, that way I could make it a point to “drink around the USA” and try them all.  While official states sodas are cool and all, they don’t hold a candle to what I’m about to consume.  Today’s selection is the NATIONAL Soft Drink of Austria and it’s called Almdudler - 50 Jahre.  Since Austrian and German are similar languages I can tell you that 50 Jahre means 50 Years and is probably not a part of the name.  Heck English is Germanic so you probably figured that one out without failing German in college.  I have no earthly idea what Almdudler is, if it is indeed anything other than a brand.  TO GOOGLE! 

Ok, so Almdudler is just a brand, but the name apparently comes from an old phrase “auf der Alm dudeln” which means singing in the alpine meadows.  There’s your history lesson for the day and a few words that will surely end up carrying some unsuspecting Austrians to our site.  Howdy, Austrians! 

The romantic bottle scene is somewhat ruined by the giant green iguana staring at them.

Looking at the affixed English label I see that Almdudler is made with carbonated water, cane sugar, citric acid and natural flavors.  The ingredients go on to say that Almdudler contains NO preservatives or artificial ingredients.   That’s a little bit of a white lie as citric acid is a natural preservative, but since it’s the national soft drink of Austria we’ll let it slide.

Why did I think this cap would twist off?  No discernible smell comes from the bottle, but after a hefty huff I get the smallest ideas that it might be apple flavored.  The ingredients, as you might recall, just list “natural flavors” so I’m really just guessing here.  This is no time for guessing though, it’s time for drinking.

Well, it looks like I’ll be guessing for a while.  Wait… delayed apple taste, oddly enjoyable.  Almdudler doesn’t have a very strong flavor at all.  It avoids the crashing chandelier at the beginning of the play and just shoves a small boy out to quietly sing.  The initial taste has me stumped as it’s sort of fruity, but the flavor isn’t exaggerated enough for me to identify it.  Gradually I get a bit of citrus taste until I’m led to the subtle apple at the end. 

Ok, so I tried to cheat and look up the flavor of Almdudler by going to their website.  I was met with the yell of “ALMDUDLER!” and then given a… well how shall I describe it.  Did any of you ever play Monty Python’s Complete Waste of Time for PC?  No?  That doesn’t surprise me, but if you had you’d realize that this website is designed like that game from 1995.  It’s the perfect comparison, so I really don’t care if you get it or not.  Ok, so the website is very click friendly and has little surprises when you hover your mouse over it.  Here, go to the website already.  Just promise you’ll come back.

Long story somewhat shorter, I never found out the actual flavor of Almdudler, but I’m going to stick by my citrus to apple flavor assessment and recommend that you try it.  There is a bitterness that takes residence within my mouth as I take sip after sip.  It’s not going away, even if I wait a few minutes between consumption.  This bitterness, even though I’m not a fan, does keep the beverage from being too sweet.  I’ll take slightly bitter over nauseatingly sweet any day.  Such an odd experience.  The flavors are so familiar, but just different enough that it seems fresh.  If I had to classify it as a soda though, I’d probably say bitter apple.  Doesn’t that sound delicious?  Bitter Apple soda?  Yes, yes it does sound delicious.  There I answered for you.  Almdudler on the other hand is bitter apple soda plus, and the plus is really a minus in my opinion because something just isn’t working for me.

~A

 

Cherry Breese

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Hey, NERD!  You lookin' for something to read, NERD?  Too bad, because this soda has already been reviewed on Episode 37 of TheSodaJerks.net Popcast!  Find out what we thought of it and more "after the jump" as they used to say 3 years ago.  Don't get to feeling down though, here's a picture of the soda you wanted reviewed. 

 

Twist hates misspelled words.

RootJack

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The folks at RootJack told the folks at ThirstMonger to tell me to drink RootJack without ice at an extremely cold temperature…purple monkey dishwasher.  I’m pretty sure the part about the purple monkey dishwasher was something added along the line, but needless to say I was quite pleased to see a beverage company tell me to stay away from ice.  So for a week this bottle of RootJack, Orange Flavored Root Beer, sat at the back of my fridge chilling.  Everytime I’d open the door I’d want to reach in and drink it, but I couldn’t… I must wait.  How does one keep oneself from drinking such an ususual product?  Orange flavored Root Beer, I’d never heard of such a thing, but my mind tells me it should work.  Looking at the label I’m happy to see that RootJack is sweetened with sugar and also contains a bit of guarana seed extract for energy.  This fun hybrid of flavors also has 100% of the vitamin C I need in a day, to fight scurvy of course.  With that said, it’s time for me to crack open this bottle and set sail for nowheres in particulars.

The scent that rises from the depths of Davy Jones locker is root beer heavy with a hint of the orange promised on the front of the bottle.  Do you know what a pirate’s favorite letter is?  You probably think it’s RRRRRRR, but he truly lives for the C.  Moving on.

TWist is better known at the Dread Pirate Roberts.

That is super bizarre.  Wow.  The first few glugs were just straight root beer, but then the citrus took hold of my taste buds and punched them square in the jaw.  The hint of orange the aroma spoke about was just the tip of the krackens tentacle.  I thought that RootJack would be root beer with a hint of orange.  I thought wrong as each sip starts off like calm day at sea; just enjoying a root beer with my swabbies, then the orange whale throws itself on board looking for Ahab.  It’s really confusing for my mouth and brain.  Each is frantically trying to figure out if it’s ok with this mixture of worlds. 

The sweetness level of RootJack is just right as I would have no problem drinking this with a meal.  While the flavor is wild, I still feel like it could pair well with your standard fare of hamburgers and hotdogs without taking away anything from them.  I’m also seeing why they wanted me to drink this cold.  The orange flavor could come off as offending to some if this was room temperature.  Even the bottle tells you to “Serve Cold”.  When’s the last time you saw another soda tell you the obvious? 

As the soda bottle empties the orange flavor becomes a bit more bitter, but not enough to turn me away from finishing it off.  Now that I have a proper place to put my message written on parchment, I’ll give you my final thoughts.  RootJack is truly a unique beverage from start to finish.  The mixture of two common flavors may confuse the mind to the point of not knowing if what you’re ingesting is something you like or not, but once you get your mind right you’ll find you wish you had another.  I’ve gotta hand it  to RootJack for taking a chance and setting themselves apart from the rest of the sodas out there.  The flavor combo was a little too combative for my tastes, but I still want to recommend that you buy multiples if just for giving some to your friends.

~A

Something Natural - Strawberry Peach

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ThirstMonger has once again sent me a beverage for review and it comes in the prettiest little bottle I’ve ever seen.  Something Natural Strawberry Peach is a sparkling water that comes in a shapely blue bottle and includes a friendly looking bird.  If I had to guess, I’d say the bird is a sparrow, wren, or finch, but then again I’m no ornithologist.  With a quick glance at the ingredients I notice that Something Natural lives up to its name with completely natural ingredients.  The sweetener is a double act of cane sugar and stevia which is a show I’ve seen delivered with success.  Just looking at this bottle is brining my mind a bit of peace after a long day of work.  I may keep this one for the collection, but not before reviewing it of course.

I picked the strawberry peach flavor because it seemed that would translate better for sparkling water than the other flavor I had at my disposal, black cherry.  Once I cracked the bottle open I was surprised to get as strong of an aroma as I did.  Both the strawberry and peach scents went straight to my olfactory glands and made their presence known.  Perhaps this sparkling water will be more soda like than I first anticipated.

Twist apologizes for the fuzziness of this picture

Something Natural Strawberry Peach really is a calming beverage.  Holding the bottle and drinking from it almost feels vacationesque and the flavor you get is quite nice as well.  Without consulting my site I can tell you immediately that this is the one of the best sparkling waters I’ve ever had.  The strawberry peach flavor is true and unwavering with peach being the lead in the play.  The stevia’s known aftertaste is lost amongst the carbonation and cane sugar.  It’s not a sugary beverage by any means, but it’s sweeter than most other sparkling waters I’ve had.  My biggest criticism will come from the aftertaste and it’s hard to single out Something Natural in this instance.  All sparkling waters have a dry, somewhat bitter aftertaste to me that nudges me out of the experience.  Now I’m sure many look forward to this aftertaste, but I’m not one of those people.  Something Natural Strawberry Peach does indeed have this same dry, bitter aftertaste that I’d rather it not have, but it’s what I’m working with.

All in all though, Something Natural is a solid beverage with good flavor presentation and a great ingredient list.  If you’re into sparkling waters I bet you’d love it.  Now if sparkling water isn’t your thing, I’d still probably give this a try to make sure your opinion is validated.

~A

Flathead Lake Black Raspberry

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Montana’s Legendary Soda, Flathead Lake, is known around the parts as almost being an above average soda.  For whatever reasons it never seems to be able to touch that rung of the latter and ends up falling off before it can achieve greatness.  Today’s Flathead Lake soda flavor is black raspberry.  I’m quite happy with this flavor selection as it is the superior taste when compared to its fake blue counterpart.  So there you have it.  Flathead Lake soda is average, but this flavor is one of my favorites.  Who will win out?

There's some kind of copyright infringement here, but I'm not sure who the guilty party is.

A delicious candy grape aroma rises from the bottle, which is odd since it’s a blackberry soda.  If I pretend hard enough I can make myself believe that I also smell the blackberry, but I can’t.  Hopefully I’ll be able to taste it.

Ok, so the taste is a bit grapey as well.  I’m going to go ahead and promise never to use the term “grapey” ever again.  Let’s move on, shall we?  Thankfully the second half of my experience does indeed taste like an artificially delicious black raspberry full of sugar and chemicals.  Still though, if someone were to give me this soda in a glass I’d assume it was grape, that can’t be good for the Flathead Lake flavor department.  Even though the flavor is mostly wrong it’s still a very tasty soda and the blackberry aftertaste is rather pleasant.  If anything I might label this as a grape/raspberry hybrid and go from there.  The carbonation level for this confused liquid is small, but tingly so it never really gets in the way.  All 43 grams of sugar are accounted for as you’d never mistake this for something healthy.  This level of sweetness makes Flathead Lake Black Raspberry ride the line of “drink with meal” and “drink for dessert”.  Flavor confusion aside this is probably my favorite entry from Flathead Lake.  Great job, guys!

~A

 

Sof Drink Grape

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It has been three years since the kool kat on the Sof Drink label has visited my home.  Today this Jamaican feline finds himself on a bottle of Sof Drink Grape and I’m happy to see him.  I just got through traipsing around a cemetery so I’m a bit thirsty from all the walking.  Thankfully my tongue knew exactly what it wanted when I opened the fridge.  It wanted to be reunited with grape soda and the kool kat was the perfect door man for the job.  Even though Sof Drink Grape claims to have the original Jamaican flavor (of what I’m not sure) it still uses HFCS in its production.  Currently I’m a bit too thirsty to care and while I should be drinking water to quench this thirst my willpower isn’t strong enough to do so.  So let me dive into this grape soda and see what happens.

A grape soda without any real scent… that’s a first.  At least I think that’s a first, I didn’t really feel like researching the previous sentence so I suggest you just trust me on it.  If I place one nostril over the mouth of the bottle and inhale deeply I begin to smell a candy grape aroma, but it really is quite faint.  Something tells me the flavor will be much more powerful.

Twist things this drink is grape.

Well that’s fun.  Sof Drink Grape tastes like a melted grape popsicle with some added carbonation.  I could honestly stop writing the review at this point, but only one sentence of description might not look so hot.  It’s a very thick grape soda in the fact that it grabs hold of all the pores of my mouth and refuses to let go.  Even after the velvet curtain of syrup falls the actors on the stage stay there to be crushed under its weight.  The carbonation is the only thing keeping this beverage from being an Otter Pop that never found the freezer.  Alexander the Grape has been poured into a bottle and someone ruffled his hair up a little.  While this aspect makes it a very sweet drink it’s not so sugary that your question if you should continue consumption with each sip. 

I’ve already made the popsicle comparison twice now which shows that I really didn’t have any more in my sleeve.  This shows me that I should just stop and you just trust that the comparison is all you need to understand what Sof Drink Grape is.  It’s a tasty, thick, grape soda that tastes like a popsicle.  There I go again.

~A

 

 

Party Pop

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It’s a little after midnight and I wasn’t even sure I was going to write a review today, but apparently I am.  My wife and I live with three animals so the house is rarely quiet.  It’s so rare that when you couple a silent house with darkness it becomes a little creepy.  I snuck downstairs, as to not wake the puppy, and blindly reached into the refrigerator.  What greeted me was a fairly creepy site in itself.  Two oddly drawn children stare at me from the label of this bottle of Party Pop.  Well technically the little boy is staring at me and the little girl is infatuated with the previously mentioned boy.  I don’t know what Party Pop is, but from the label alone it claims to be “The Original Foamy Soda”.  I’m going to go ahead and call that a lie without even researching it.  Other words listed on the bottle are “sangaria”, “cheers!”, “non-alcoholic”, something written in a foreign language, and weirdest of all… “kids”.  Over the ingredients I find out that this is an apple flavored soda, so it shouldn’t be terrible because “kids”.  For as strange as Party Pop is, it’s made with HFCS so it’s not off-the-rails bizarre.  The time has come for me to try “The Original Foamy Soda” known as Party Pop.  Since the “kids” seem to love it, hopefully I will too.

I think the foreign language that’s on the bottle, and now I see on the cap, is Japanese.  For the record, this is bottled in California.  Such an odd soda.  It smells like apple juice.  I’d go into more descriptive terminology if it smelled any different than apple juice, but it doesn’t.  Apple anything isn’t listed as an ingredient.  No apple juice, artificial apple, natural (apple) flavor, mock apples, how ‘bout them apples, there’s nothing about apples.  Fantastic.  I hope this blows my socks off, because that would just complete this peculiar experience.

Twist could steal her away in an instant.

WHOA ALL THAT FOAM!  Kidding.  It is a little foamier than your standard soda, but I’m not sure I’d make it a marketing point.  Perhaps if I still had my youthful innocence I could see myself pouring this into a glass and pretending to drink beer.  That’s exactly what this is, by the way.  This is kid beer.  It’s the color of beer, it develops a head like beer, and it’s called Party Pop like beer.  It’s “kids” beer.  Anywho.  It tastes like an apple soda that didn’t quite make it. 

The carbonation level is light and fizzy, fun some might say.  On the other hand that apple juice scent I was picking up earlier isn’t quite as honest.  There is an apple flavor being represented here, but it’s constantly haunted by a bitter ghost.  Before the apple flavor even hits the bitter ghost resides in my mouth chasing all of good flavors away.  The good flavors that do stay have to walk through said ghost, thus tainting their once tasty skins.  Slimed if you will.  What I’m about to say isn’t 100% accurate, but it’s the best comparison I can think of at this time of night.  Party Pop tastes like it’s 80% Apple Juice and 20% beer.  For some reason I capitalized “apple juice”, but not beer.  No idea why, moving on.  This beer/apple juice hybrid obviously isn’t working for me, but it’s not horrible.  Actually I take that back.  With each sip I try the bitterness builds on itself making Party Pop less “pop” and more “mistake.

This kid on the label with his cocked party hat is really starting to bother me.  It’s like he’s bragging about gaining the eye of the girl next to him.  Like he’s gloating to me that she’ll never be mine.  Dude you’re like 10 at the most.  I could take you out with one punch and I’m a weak 30 something.  Whataya going to do?  “Kids”.

~A

 

Vacation in a Bottle - Pomegranate Berry

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Today’s offering from Thirst Monger comes in a very serene bottle emblazoned with a picture of the sun setting over a great body of water.  Vacation in a Bottle, or as the kids call it ViB (pronounced Vibe), is the name of the beverage and the flavor is Pomegranate Berry.  I already feel as if I’m going to enjoy it.  I’m not usually one for full bottle art, but the more I stare at this sunset the more I just want to kick back and relax.  Being the ad guru that I am, I already see something they could improve upon… their slogan.  Currently their slogan is “Drink. Chill. Be Happy!”  While this is all well and good why not switch up a few words and make it “Chill. Drink. Be Happy!”?  Chill would take on a double meaning at this point and ultimately it would just work better.  If they take my advice I expect a nice crisp Benji headed my way. 

Twist is on Step Two of the ViB three step program.

ViB is caffeine free and uses cane sugar as a sweetener.  There’s a whole host of other ingredients, so if you’re interested, look them up.  As you know I’m concerned with the taste and I’m tired of waiting.

This beverage is in an aluminum bottle which is something I wish drink manufacturers would migrate towards more often.  I’d much rather drink out of an aluminum bottle than a plastic one.  I’m sure cost comes into play here, but in my world it doesn’t, so get with the program other companies!

A somewhat easily identified pomegranate aroma flows from the large mouth of the bottle.  There is indeed another berry scent blended in, but it seems vague in nature.  I noticed my mouth started watering though as soon as I took a whiff.  At least I know the scent has created some positive ViBs for my mind.  You see what I did there?  I took the name of the soda and used it somewhat incorrectly in a sentence.

Vacation in a Bottle – Pomegranate Berry is a bit sweeter than I thought it would be.  The ingredients list 10 grams of sugar per 8 ounces so I thought it might be a little short in the sweet spot.  I was wrong.  The sweetness plays well with the pomegranate and berry flavors.  At this point I’m going to stop referring to the generic berry flavor since the pomegranate is clearly the lead actor in this play.  Carbonation is fast and light, but powerful.  It feels like a miniaturized version of the same carbonation you’d find in a Coke brand Coke.  Overall I’m quite pleased with ViB. 

The flavor is strong enough to keep me from forgetting that I’m drinking a soda, but the mouth feel is light enough that it doesn’t seem like I’m drinking straight syrup.  There is a point in each sip though where I get a quick taste of artificial.  I’m not saying that anything in this is artificial, but just be warned that the initial flavor doesn’t flow through 100%.  With that said, I’ve already finished the bottle and would drink another, so it obviously didn’t bother me too incredibly much.  All in all Vacation in a Bottle – Pomegranate Berry was a good experience.  It did many things right and few things wrong, if you see some I recommend giving it a shot.

~A

Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange

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It’s 9:00 in the morning, which is usually way too early for a soda review.  Last week though was lacking in said reviews so I figured I’d try to get an early start to this week by writing one in the A.M.  When I opened my fridge I tried to find the most breakfast like flavor and Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange was the most obvious at hand.  After pondering it for a moment I realized that strawberry orange isn’t exactly a common flavor, yet it seems like the two would pair fairly often in the soda world.  The two should create a tart yet sweet sensation that’s fun for the whole family.  I’ve never been particularly impressed with the ingredients of Flathead Lake sodas so we’ll just hope it delivers big on flavor.  That’s what this is all about anyway, right?

A fun fruit punchesque aroma simultaneously greets my nose and excites my brain for the flavor that may be contained within this glass prison.  The bright red-orange color of the soda itself is also rather inviting as the beads of condensation roll down the neck of the bottle.  If I was to rate this on just appearance and scent then Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange would be doing very well.  Of course all citizens of the Carbo-Nation know that those two are only part of what makes a soda great. 

I immediately can tell that if this were fizzier I’d like it a lot more.  There is indeed a created flavor that begins to taste like strawberry/orange yet it takes the exit to cotton candyville somewhere near the end of each sip.  This is made even more noticeable by the amount of carbonation used in the beverage as I said less than three sentences ago.  While the carbonation levels are not low by any means, if the fizz levels where higher my tongue would be focused on the tiny explosions happening on it rather than the vague sugary flavor this soda eventually becomes.  The vague sugary flavor isn’t terrible, mind you.  I just wish that the initial strawberry/orange combination had been strong enough to last throughout each swig.  Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange is still a good drink in terms of taste, look, and scent.  Thankfully, there is no terrible aftertaste, but the velvet curtain of syrup fall on the stage that is my mouth.  All in all this soda starts off quite tasty, but the soda itself is its own undoing.  Like so many sodas before it the flavor can’t support the weight of all the drinks taken prior.  This causes the soda drinking experience to go from enjoyable to consuming liquid sugar just to finish it.  It’s this aspect that makes Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange an average soda.

~A

Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange580.JPG

Twist keeps asking for a pair of tiny sunglasses.

Jack Black's Orange Stash

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I always appreciate an orange soda that uses cane sugar and orange juice (concentrate most times).  I really appreciate it when the picture on the bottle uses a pirate theme and calls it an “Orange Stash”.  In case you’re the type not to read the title of these reviews, today’s article is on Jack Black’s Orange Stash.  If I’m to believe everything I read on this label, this is only the second time this particular flavor has been available.  I’m hoping that the fact it’s an orange “stash” and not an orange soda gives me a unique beverage to try, but something tells me I may be disappointed.  Let’s find out together… as a family.

Comedy abounds in the world of Jack Black sodas.  Under the bottle cap reads the following:  “Once you have Jack Black you won’t switch back”.  JOKES.  With that said the orange scent I was expecting to come off the top of the bottle isn’t there.  If I take a strong whiff I can begin to identify the scent as orange.  Hopefully the flavor won’t be as hard to find.

The orange in Jack Black’s Orange Stash isn’t as intense as I’d like it to be, but with that said it’s a tasty treat for my tongue.  It’s not as sugary to me as your standard orange soda and this allows for the orange flavor to be enjoyed for a longer period of time.  The carbonation isn’t overly strong either which once again accentuates the star of the show, Orange.  Even though I just stated the carbonation level isn’t that high it does still have an aspect of fun to it.  It’s a light fizzy sensation that runs quickly from here to there in my mouth.  All in all Jack Black’s Orange Stash is a pretty good beverage.  The orange flavoring, while not a perfect replica, is more natural tasting than your standard orange soda.  I’m sad to say, but the downside to this soda is that it’s kind of boring.  Sure it’s a tasty beverage, but there’s not much about it that will make me want to recall it if I’m ever asked for an orange soda recommendation.  If given the option I’d drink multiple bottles of this, but I wouldn’t really cry if I ran out.

~A

Jack Black's Orange Stash580.JPG

Twist is the Dread Pirate Roberts

Rocket Fizz Watermelon

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Ok, so remember that entire week where I didn’t post a single review?  Forget it.  This week is a new week and at the very least you’re going to get a review about a watermelon flavored soda by Rocket Fizz.  As we all know (and if you don’t just fake it) Rocket Fizz is the soda that features fun flavors and is sweetened by cane sugar.  Another globally known fact is that I don’t like watermelon, but usually enjoy watermelon flavored items.  I’m not really sure how this concept works in the real world, but it does.  In case you forgot due to lack of reviews, here’s the part where I tell you it’s time to open this bottle and get to drinking.

If the pink coloring of the soda wasn’t enough to show me it’s supposed to taste like watermelon, the aroma certainly did.  Since I don’t particularly like the taste of watermelon, this beverage smells kind of gross to me.  Again, I’m not exactly sure why I tend to enjoy watermelon-esque things, especially when their scents are often off-putting.  Perhaps there is some kind of magic at work here.  Here’s to watermagicon!

Nope.  I’m not fond of this.  The taste is somewhat accurate as my memory reaches back as far as it can to pull up the file labeled “watermelon taste”.  Best I can tell though, this tastes more like a candy watermelon than the actual fruit.  So technically it’s a watermelon flavored soda that tastes like a watermelon flavored candy that tastes like watermelon.  I’m thinking my brain is just outright rejecting this idea entirely.  Each sip I take begins with a hopeful thought which is quickly run over by an overly sweet, syrupy, watermelon wave.  The carbonation can’t even save it as my brain can’t concentrate on the bubbles due to the disgusting flavor.  I’m going to stop the review here.  It’s a little premature, but you don’t need to listen to me berate a beverage because it’s based on a flavor I normally don’t like.  I don’t like watermelon and this soda tastes enough like it that I don’t like the soda.  If you like watermelon (a word I’ve now typed a ridiculous number of times) then maybe you’ll like Rocket Fizz Watermelon, or maybe you’ll think it’s too sweet… because it is.

~A

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Twist is just happy it's not the devil's fruit known as cantaloupe

PJ's Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry

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Anyone out there have any sort of idea of what a loganberry is?  I certainly don’t.  Thirstmonger sent me a bottle, of what looks to be a delicious, loganberry soda.  I didn’t really feel like doing any research on what loganberries are, thankfully the label sensed this and told me.  Apparently the loganberry was discovered in the 1880’s and is a cross between a red raspberry and a blackberry.  Zero things sound bad about that, so obviously I’m excited about trying this sugar sweetened beverage.  As an added bonus this bottle of (I guess including the name would be helpful) PJ’s Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry soda has a decent amount of Vitamin A, B6, B12, and E.  A quick glance over the ingredients also teaches me that actual loganberry juice is used in the making of this beverage as well.  Well color me intrigued.

The red raspberry is the dominating scent, although you can tell its sweetness is muted a little bit by the blackberry.  Frankly, Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry smells delightful and reminds me of a tasty sno-cone/snow cone/sno ball/shaved ice.

Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry is so effervescent that it’s still fizzing in the back of my throat and I love it.  The flavor isn’t quite as tart as I thought it would be.  Sweet seems to be the defining characteristic of the loganberry.  Granted this is a loganberry with 42 grams of sugar in it so I’m sure the taste is altered just a bit.  All the same, the fruity taste of red raspberry with hints of grape and blackberry has coated my mouth in an enjoyable curtain of flavor.  Remember when I said it smelled like a sno-cone?  I really hope you do because even the slowest readers should have read that sentence two minutes ago at most.  Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry tastes like sno-cone soda.  It’s like they took the juice at the bottom of a sno-cone and carbonated it to a fun level.  Like I said, this is quite the sweet soda so it may not be for everyone.  I would place this soda in the “treat” category instead of the “enjoy with food” category. 

Now of course there is some critique that must be present with the praise.  In the case of Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry we’ve already touched on one potential negative for some of you, the sweetness.  I won’t be addressing that any further.  The other issue I have is that the taste is a bit muddled.  “A loganberry is a muddle red raspberry and blackberry” you say?  Why yes it is, but this flavor does not seem to be made by nature.  A berry is crisp and tart which is what Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry is missing.  If this beverage were tart in the slightest I’d drink it until I died, but instead of being perfect it’s merely tasty.  See, it’s not that bad of a problem.  It just kept it from being outstanding.

All in all, Crystal Beach Sparkling Loganberry is a very fun soda to drink.  The variety in the fruit flavor, the insane carbonation, and the delicious coating it leaves in your mouth are all things you should be looking forward to if you try it.

~A

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Twist prefers the more intense Wolverineberry

Barton Springs Soda Company - Orange Cream Soda

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I’m always pleased when my great state produces delicious products and even happier when those products happen to be soda.  Today I’m giving the city of Austin a chance with their Barton Springs Soda Company – Orange Cream Soda.  The label is simple, but nice to look at.  In fact it almost looks like they made it at home.  The color of the soda is a natural looking orange; not to be confused with the ridiculous orange color that sodas like this normally are.  If you end up wanting to make some Barton Springs Orange Soda for yourself at home here’s all you need:  carbonated water, sugar, natural flavors, citric acid, and a bunch of Benzosorbosucra-lates.  Ok, so the last ingredient is really an amalgamation of words listed.  Still, this is from Texas and I’m excited to see what my home has produced.

Even though “Orange Cream Soda” is listed as the flavor, the scent that reaches my nose is that of tangerine sans cream.  I’m really quite curious how creamy this beverage will actually be.  I suppose I could taste it.

Fortunately for all involved in this process the flavor is indeed orange and the creaminess does exist within the same realm of reality.  With my first sip a burst of orange flavor cascades along my tongue, waking up every taste-bud it rushes over.  The citrus taste seems stronger due to the carbonation involved, but is unmistakable nonetheless.  Now the cream that is promised on the label comes late to the game.  After the citrus rush begins to subside an almost artificial creaminess takes its place.  I won’t say that it tastes bad, but there’s something a little off about it.  In fact the beverage seems to weaken a bit with each sip I take.  The sugary sweetness of Barton Springs Orange Cream Soda begins to take over and ruin the party for both the orange flavoring and the cream finish.  The orange flavoring begins to be shoved in a corner behind big brother Sweetness, while the decent job Cream was performing has turned into an over the top mess.  Frighteningly enough, I’m only halfway through with the bottle before the sugar invasion began.  Sadly I’m going to surrender and stop drinking at this point.  Someone with a sweeter tooth than mine might enjoy this, but I’m out.

~A

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The fact that the soda is orange and from Austin has Twist suspicious

Hiball Organic Energy Drink - Pomegranate Acai

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While I’m sure I’ve had an organic energy drink, I honestly can’t remember the name of it.  If only there were drink review site that had a search function!  Hiball Organic Energy Drink – Pomegranate Acia sits in front of me in a rather classy looking can.  The Hiball logo is crisp and simple, making it a pleasure to look at.  If I examine this container a bit closer I see that Hiball Pomegranate Acai uses both organic caffeine and organic sugar in the creation of this beverage.  Just to add to this greatness is the fact that the organic sugar used is Fair Trade Certified.  Since it’s an energy drink Hiball Pomegranate Acai is also chock full of B Vitamins, and other ingredients like Guarana Extract, Ginseng Extract, and others.  Truthfully, my mind is a little perplexed in trying to figure out what this will taste like.  Will it be a fruity sensation or will the energy drink side take over like Mr. Hyde?  Let’s see if I can’t sniff this out.

The can opens without a lot of push, which makes me think the carbonation won’t be that strong.  An aroma of various berries, also known as berrious, makes its way to the opening of the can.  My knowledge is lacking when it comes to identifying pomegranate and acai, so I’m hesitant to tell you that this is what it smells like.  Perhaps a taste test in in order.

My initial reaction to Hiball Pomegranate Acai isn’t a positive one.  Each act in this play seems to be marred by the kid sitting behind me named “Bitter Billy”.  I take a sip and see the first act upon the stage.  A cool refreshing sensation skips across the stage and starts its monologue.  Bitter Billy flicks my ear and giggles.  Pomegranate and Acai walk out in what looks to be a pretty good ventriloquist act, but I can’t concentrate on it because Bitter Billy has started kicking my seat as hard as he can.  The final act shows all of the characters on stage for a rousing final number, I think I even see carbonation dressed as a tiny clown.  It doesn’t matter though because Bitter Billy has taken a lighter to my hair and I’m missing it all.  Hidden behind each outburst of Bitter Billy looks to be a fairly enjoyable energy drink, but I cannot see past this poorly behaved child.  I could finish this beverage if I wanted to, but I don’t.  Even if the crowd starts chanting for an encore I don’t care to be anywhere near that kid anymore.  All the organic ingredients, all of the B Vitamins, all of the class the label shows can’t compete with this one taste factor.  Sad really.

~A

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Twist's sugar is always organic.

Flathead Lake Sour Cherry

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I’ve made it no mystery that I enjoy sour beverages.  What a terrible mystery that would be. If it was an Encyclopedia Brown book you’d throw it away at the big reveal.  “Turns out Aaron LIKES sour sodas!”… aaaaand in the trash.  Of course something can be so sour it’s hard to enjoy, but for the most part I enjoy most sour sodas, or at least the idea behind them.  Flathead Lake Sour Cherry is what sits in my cup holder at the moment and I’m about to take a dive into it, mouth first.  The color is a delightful dark red, almost maroon, which gives my eyes a hint of what’s to come.  A look at the ingredients shows that I’m about to ingest a bunch of chemicals and “natural flavors”.  Well then, there’s no time like the present to ingest some chemicals!

A rich, cherry sno-cone syrup-esque (double hyphenated word, nice) aroma reaches out of the bottle and socks me in the nose.  Chemicals or not, I’m now a bit more excited to give this soda a chug.

Oh, that’s right.  Flathead Lake soda is seems to always be a little more watery than you’d expect.  Fortunately for Sour Cherry it’s not so watery that I’m going to deduct points, it just took me off guard.  As for the “sour” portion of sour cherry… it’s noticeable, but your cheeks aren’t going to pucker at all.  It’s certainly discernible from your standard cherry soda though.  The bubbles are tight and few in number, yet strong enough to be a part of the drinking experience with every sip.  Sadly there is a bit of a syrup curtain that falls at the end of each act.  This curtain has a pleasant taste, but overstays its welcome with each lowering.  While an encore wouldn’t be a terrible thing, I’d really just prefer if this soda ended on the sour sensation it leaves at the tip of my tongue.  Ah well, someone get Sandman to pull ‘em off stage and we won’t have that problem anymore.  Didn’t think you’d find a Showtime at the Apollo reference in a soda review?  You must be new to the site.  Welcome!

All in all Flathead Lake Sour Cherry is a tasty soda, but nothing to write to Mom about.  Granted I just did write to my mom about it because she reads the site, but I digress.

~A

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Twist has been mistaken as the Flathead Lake Monster for years.  He's not it though as he's much, much older.

Faygo Original Red Pop

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Red pop is a somewhat foreign concept to me.  I understand that it’s a big deal in other parts of the country, but here in Houston I’d be surprised to see it in a local grocery store.  Even though it makes perfect sense I find regional soda love very odd.  What shaped the history and tastes of that region?  Why does Maine love Moxie so much?  Why is red pop a northern thing?  Why is Cheerwine a Carolina thing?  I’m sure there’s a simple answer to all of those, probably mostly based on the origin of the product.  I still find it interesting.  I also find it interesting that red pop, or in this case Faygo Original Red Pop, is just strawberry soda.  Why not just call it strawberry soda?  I’ve had red pop once before, so my venture into this world isn’t completely unique.  I’m hoping that the cane sugar sweetened version of red pop will be even tastier.  Let’s find out, shall we?

The scent of Faygo Original Red Pop is somewhat muted and I must say I’m a bit shocked by this.  When I think of a strawberry soda, I think of an overly sweetened, cotton candy-esque beverage that sits on my tongue for hours after consumption.  This version of red pop, based on the smell at least, seems like it may be a bit tamer to the taste.

I was correct, this isn’t your standard sugary red liquid made to taste like candied strawberries.  Faygo Original Red Pop feels like an adult version of strawberry soda.  Let’s not pretend it’s not sweet, it most certainly is, but the flavor that accompanies said sweetness isn’t trying to impress you.  A well-defined strawberry flavor that leans towards candy a bit more than actual strawberries is the first experience my tongue runs into.  The carbonation gives my mouth a hybrid sensation of both fizzy and fluffy, keeping the experience fun the whole way through.  At the apex of the swig the middle of my tongue experiences a shock of sweetness that slowly vanishes becoming nothing more than a memory.  I don’t really even have time to figure out if that peak of sweetness was in fact too sweet for my taste buds.  Honestly, I don’t care.  I think influx of sugary taste is another reason the beverage stays fun.  If it all tasted like that it’d be overkill and I wouldn’t even try to finish the bottle.  Fortunately, this soda seems to pace itself as it’s being consumed.  Fun carbonation here, quick burst of sweetened strawberry flavor here, smooth mouth feel here… it works.

Faygo Original Red Pop is not strawberry soda and I’m happy to have figured that out, but it’s really hard to explain why it isn’t what it clearly states it is.  Let’s use geometry for example.  A square can both truthfully be called a square or a rectangle as it has four right angles.  No one is going to call see a square and call it a rectangle even though it would be the truth.  Faygo Original Red Pop is a strawberry soda, it’s also Red Pop.  Guess which one it deserves to be called.  I had a hard time rating this, but the more I think about it I realize that I would want more than 4 in my fridge.

~A

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Twist is a green pop, but that's a story for another time